Ever since I’ve been blogging about dogs and dog related stories, I’ve had a few friends of mine come up to me and ask about dogs. I think i need to make a confession: I’ve only had dogs for about a year and I really don’t know much about dogs, training dogs, dog nutrition, etc.

Actually, I spend a quite amount of time online reading dog info and watching dog training videos. The trick is to actually APPLY what you learned, so I do. Some of these tips do work, and some don’t. The ones that do, i blog about them.  So I guess when my friends read them, they think I’m like the PawshPal.com Dog Whisperer or something.

But I do get some of the most ridiculous questions, especially those that are interested in getting a dog. I’ve compiled some of them; here are the most frequently asked ones and my responses:

1. What type of dog can I get that doesn’t bark, shed hair, or won’t eat and poop too much?

A dead one.

The dog that you just described doesn’t exist. In Disney movies, maybe. Real life, no.

2. Is it true that dogs fart and have diarrhea?

Come smell my dog after I give him some tofu.

3. Do all dogs need to be walked? I heared breeds like pomeranians and shitzus don’t need it.

If you want your dog to get fat, be a plethora of health problems, get rowdy around the house, and poop all over the dog, no. Otherwise, yes. It doesn’t matter what breed or size.

4. Can I borrow your dog for a weekend to see if I like it?

Can I borrow your kids to see if I like having kids?

5. I can’t get a male dog because they’ll hump my leg.

Please. Don’t flatter yourself. Your leg is not THAT sexy. In fact, female dogs, especially dominant female dogs, will lift their leg to urinate and “hump” other dogs or objects.

6. I can’t stand watching dogs hump each other. It’s disgusting.

It’s not just about sex. It’s usually more about social dominance than actual reproducing. In fact, neutering and spaying are not a sure cure for humping.

7. Should I buy or adopt?

If you have a heart, please adopt dogs. There’s way too many in shelters that need your love. All of my dogs were adopted.

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It’s 1 AM. Appointment to get my dog Cocoa’s balls chopped off is in 7 hours. I can’t sleep; what do I do? Chop them off or keep them?

My logical side says to go for it. But my gut tells me this isn’t the way to go. My heart tells me God made them for a reason. As long as I can control my dogs (and thus, his breeding pattern), I should be ok. What i meant was… he should be ok.

I find myself in an odd engima. I am nervous. My hands are sweaty. I feel like I have butterflies in my stomache.

Would appreciate any comments or feedbacks.

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I know I shouldn’t post this considering how Koreans get bad stereotype as people who eat dogs, but I just could not resist this Kodak moment that Rose’s niece took while I was about to consume play with my dog Brownie.

Note the cool PawshPal.com collar tag he’s wearing.

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My dog, Cocoa, almost became doggie pate today. Of course, I wasn’t there to witness the event, but TaeWoo retold the story to me.

He was walking the dogs this morning while I went to my yoga class. Cocoa happened to spot two huge St. Bernards at the park and decided he’d bolt towards them and start barking - as if he was trying to be macho. I cannot understand why he does this. I would totally question his behavior if only he could talk.

Anyhow, the tables turned and instead of Cocoa being a loud little dog barking away, the two St. Bernards starting chasing after him. Mind you, none of these dogs were leashed. Why? Because I guess we owners enjoy giving our dogs freedom at the risk of these types of things happening. I’m sure they don’t enjoy being tugged by the neck. Who would?

Back to the story. Since the two big dogs decided to chase Cocoa and show him who’s boss, the little guy freaked out (not so macho anymore) and started zooming across the big open field toward the streets. At this point my boyfriend was not only angry, but nervous as well. Several cars zipping by had to dodge Cocoa as he stood in the middle of the street. If he wasn’t black, I’d say his face would’ve turned completely white!

My other two dogs, Lucky and Brownie, were just chillin’ on the sidelines the whole time. Luckily, Cocoa was retrieved from the streets and the other two dogs were held back by their owners. Cocoa’s retribution? The same as the St. Bernards. A good woopin’ on the butt.

The positive? All dogs came home safely and both dog owners mutually apologized. I really really hope Cocoa learns his lesson today, but somehow I don’t think he has. Dogs are like children. They don’t really learn till it really hurts and although I could see that all my dogs came home safely, I was nervous while my boyfriend told me the story. Sighs….I don’t like doggie pate.

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News about people is interesting. But news about animals, now that’s what I call true entertainment.

Of course, it’s not the pet/animals alone in the news. It’s usually the people doing stuff to them.

Dog taped to fridge

BOULDER, Colo. — Police found an 8-month-old puppy — its feet, snout and tail bound in clear packing tape, a plastic bag and elastic hair ties — stuck to the side of a refrigerator in a Boulder home Tuesday morning, the apparent victim of a domestic dispute between its owner and his girlfriend.

Abby Toll, 20, was arrested on suspicion of felony animal cruelty after telling police she taped the puppy, a shiba inu named Rex, to the fridge because she was angry at her boyfriend for not getting rid of his pet after it had bitten her.

“There’s a dog taped to the fridge,” she reportedly told an officer who responded to a call about a domestic incident at the apartment in the 2900 block of East Aurora Avenue around 5 a.m. Tuesday. “I know this looks bad. We were going to get rid of him anyway. We usually don’t do this.”

The dog, which police said in a report appeared to be in severe pain after being released from its “tomb of tape,” was placed with the Humane Society of Boulder Valley for safekeeping.

Tape, huh? Interesting. That’s pretty novel, I must admit.

Here’s the screen shot of the female perp and the dog:

But dont’ worry. The dog has been taken in by a loving family.

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